Gratefulness in the home and heart: Lessons your children will learn from your example.

By Corallie Buchanan

How do you act in times of crisis? I know not all of us are perfect at the super-mum routine of having our lives all together. In fact, most of us don’t. We look at those who seem to have life all together, and wish we were like them.

I know as a mother of a 9 month old girl, I often fall into the same trap. When life turns sour, sometimes I allow myself the freedom to just let my mouth fly and say whatever I like. Then I regret it afterwards, because I realise that I should be more careful. My daughter’s ears are very keen, and whether I realise it or not, she is picking up on every wrong word and attitude that comes out of my mouth.

Mathew 15:18 says that what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. I have learned a very recent poignant lesson from watching other people. If you are not grateful and praising God for your blessings – no matter how miniscule they may seem – those things which you refuse to be grateful for will eventually be taken away from you. What lies in your heart will eventually work its way through your mouth. This is dangerous ground, because then it begins to poison your life to the point where there isn’t a shred of goodness left.

There are times in our lives when we wish everything was going our way. It is how we act in those times that determine who we really are, rather than what we claim to be. Whether we like it or not, our children will pick up on our behaviour – both good and bad -  during times of trial. What kind of example do we want to be for our children? The question posed is a serious one, for the lessons a child learns in their formative years will provide the foundation for their morals and their behaviour as adults. We need to be verbally an openly thankful for our blessings, in order that our children learn healthy normal attitudes of thankfulness to God. This will become the important foundation of their future lives.

Corallie

What to do when bad gets to worse

I will admit I did not start off this morning in a very good frame of mind. 


Well, I lie. 


I was okay, that is, until I put my feet on the floor. That is when everything began to go wrong. 


What do you do when you wake up to bad news? I didn't handle it the way a Christian should handle it. To be honest, I wasn't very Christ-like this morning.


I have been praying for a breakthrough in our finances, and this morning I received some not so good news regarding another area of our finances. This sent me into a minor 30 minute tailspin where I was tearing down the company that caused this new problem. After 30 minutes, I realised that the devil was just using this to steal my peace, and that if I didn't get a handle on it, there would be no writing done today.


So I sat down and got quiet before God. Now 8 months ago, something like this would have had me upset all day. But I was encouraged to see that after half an hour of fleshly 'arrrggghhh', I was able to calm down and be back to my normal self. God is growing me through this ordeal, and I am better able to handle bad news.


What do you do when the very thing you are praying and asking God for only gets worse? What do you do when you are doing everything you know, and still nothing changes? What do you do when the very reason your world is falling apart is because you are serving God? What do you do when you continually sacrifice your own comfort to help others, and nothing changes in your circumstances? 


You keep walking. Keep doing what you know God has told you to do, even if your circumstances don't look like they're going to change.


One thing God said to me recently has really stuck with me. When I asked God about what I should do, He told me something that has really stuck with me. I was whining that we don't have any money, and asking if I should go out and find paid work. He said to me, "Corallie, are you doing what you truly believe I have asked you to do?" I said, "Yes." "Well then," He said, "That's all you really need to be doing. I'm not worried about what you're doing, but why you're doing it. If you truly believe this is what you're meant to be doing, then that's all that matters. You could go out and find work if you felt that was what I was asking you to do, and I would look on it just the same as if you were writing full time." To God, the motive why I'm doing something is more important than what I am actually doing. If I'm writing to please Him or working in full time paid work to please Him, it doesn't matter. If I'm trying to please Him, that's all that matters.


I'm not always good at this, as I saw when I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. But I am reminded of the verse that says,


²⁶ “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. ²⁷ And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. ²⁸ For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it— ²⁹ lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, ³⁰ saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish’? ³¹ Or what king, going to make war against another king, does not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? ³² Or else, while the other is still a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks conditions of peace. ³³ So likewise, whoever of you does not forsake all that he has cannot be My disciple. (Luke 14:26-33)


Giving up things does not always mean that everything is going to turn out "hunky-dory". You know, I wish I had the same freedom of money that some other people have. But I don't. The trick is being satisfied with what you have. And when everything goes belly up like it did for me this morning, the hardest thing is to keep your peace. Yet it is the most important thing to do. Boy, did I have to fight this morning. But it was worth it, because now I am at peace and able to face a day of work.

A chance for grumbling becomes a blessing from God

When I saw this sunset this evening, I was reminded of God's goodness to me. You see, we were woken up quite early this morning by a lot of extremely loud banging and crashing. Because Dave and I get up early every morning, Dave to go to work, and myself to write, getting up slowly is quite a novelty. But when we awoke this morning to the sound of giant machinery tearing apart the house less than 10 metres from our bedroom window, we had every opportunity to grumble.

But instead, we curiously went outside and stood on the road with our breakfast (either that, or I was just thinking about breakfast), watching this house be demolished (at 6.30 in the morning!). This is what we heard, but much louder, and our house was shaking. Note: Our bedroom window is about roof level with the demolished house, so the sound traveled straight to us. Let alone the fact that our house is made of brick, so for it to shake, you can imagine what kind of ground vibrations the machine was making!

Yes it was freezing, we wanted more sleep, but we were also interested in seeing more clearly the action we could see taking place from our bedroom window.

Imagine our suprise when we got home from work this afternoon, to discover that not only was one of the three houses gone, we also had an additional view of the horizon which we had never enjoyed before. Many times we have seen beautiful sunsets, but have been unable to enjoy them from the comfort and warmth of our own house. 

On the very day our next door neighbour's house was demolished, we were provided with this beautiful sunset that evening. God really does bless those that follow Him with all of their hearts. We could have grumbled, but chose not to, and God honoured us for that by providing us with such a beautiful sunset. Just remember, no matter how long it takes, God can and WILL honour you when you choose to follow Him.